Monday, August 4, 2008

Change ... and then I'll marry you

Warning to Kulani: This post discusses somewhat the newest book in the Twilight series. I won't be going into too many details, but it's just another one of my philosophical rants about things I like to rant about. Keep reading, Kulani, as you may like my conclusions.

I've stated before how I hate to be a bandwagon-type of person. But some things are just so good that I have to jump on the wagon despite the number of people already on board (please don't tip the cart, people, there's room for me). Case in point being the Twilight book series. I can't wait to read the next one in the series and find out once and for all who Bella will pick: Edward or Jacob.

So the big question amongst fans is who do you like better: Edward or Jake? Here is how I break it down. Of course you can't help having an overwhelming and exausting love for Edward. He is every woman's fantasy man. He is perfect looking, perfect smelling, and perfect being. Jacob, however, is more real. He doesn't want nor need Bella to change: he likes her for her. In order for Bella to be with Edward, she will have to change ... into a blood-sucking vampire. Who would go to such lengths to be with someone?

And thus begins my diatribe on why we sometimes lose touch with romance, reality, and relationships in our culture. I can't think of very many stories, especially stories little girls love, where the main character does not try to change herself in some way in order to get the "prince." Little Mermaid must become human. Mulan lies to be included in the army. Cinderella disguises herself in a gown and glass slippers and fetching hairdo. Alladin pretends he is a prince. Even Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman had to stop being a hooker in order to get her man (oh the humanity!). So what are we saying about love: it's not based on knowing and loving the person for who they are, but for the person you want them to become. My conclusions are a little over the top, but perhaps I'm making sense. And I don't think women are the only ones guilty of "romanticising" love to a point that is not recognizable in real life. But after reading the Twilight books, I find myself needing to slow down and get back in touch with the Real World--Fisher Family.

I'm serious when I say book reading isn't an elevated hobby in our family. I tend to ignore everything and everyone around me when I start reading a really good book. Whereas, watching television together as a family we can all laugh at the same jokes, share popcorn, etc. Books are good, don't get me wrong. But television isn't necessarily bad. Especially when there's so many more episodes of No Reservations to be watched.

10 comments:

Kim said...

I go back and forth for who I want her to choose. Change isn't always bad and if someone is convincing you to be better, then, please! change and marry the man. But is an immortal vampire better than a realistic man who can offer a family? (that's a big one with me...she should want babies!) See, I originally was all for Jake. He was there for her through her darkest hour. Then I looked at my life and relationships and found similarities. I married my Edward. Not only because John is always "perfect looking and perfect smelling" (haha), but it wasn't the easy route, in the sense that he was different than the "boy next door" "there for me through hard times" boy that I dated all through high school. I'm beyond grateful that I made the choice to marry the man that pushes me to be better and look at things in a different light. Marrying the "Jake" in my life would've meant staying inside my box and never experiencing a different opinion or point of view. So boring and so hard to progress!
Making sense? I think that's a little too deep for a teen fiction and the comment a little too long for your liking! Thanks for letting me get it out anyway.

petit elefant said...

Jacob, hands down. Edward is a fantasy. I don't know of a guy anywhere on earth like him. Jake keeps it real.

Morkthefied said...

Kim, you make some good points that I'm glad you brought up because my post failed to do so. And you are right; change is good if it's for the better, and the best relationships challenge us to be better. I'm a long commenter, so please leave a long comment if the spirit moves you (maybe not the spirit, spirit, but the spirit--you know what I'm saying).

Petit, why do I think you are so cool? Because you are.

mariann and Tory said...

I don't read the books...however to drive my sister in law crazy. We went to Target and she saw the book and said that she couldn't wait to read it. I picked it up and read the last page. Yup, I no who she picks and what happens. So if you want to know...let me know!

Morkthefied said...

Oh no you dinit! Grrl, you breaking the rules of womanity!

mariann and Tory said...

I no...have you finished it yet?

MarySquare said...

Before starting to read Breaking Dawn, I realized that these books are all about unhealthy relationships. Think about the relationship that Bella has with her parents -- she is their caregiver. She feeds and clothes her dad, takes care of his emotional needs, even strips and makes his bed for him. She is the parent in the relationship.

With Edward, Edward is the father, and Bella is the daughter. He is over protective, over emotional, controlling, and the writer even describes her climbing into his lap and cuddling him like a child, and he is always stroking her face. Totally freaks me out. I kept thinking that the author would introduce a character or an idea who would be critical about the relationship. And that person isn't Jacob -- his criticism of Ed's and Bella's relationship doesn't go deep enough, when what they have is what he wants.

I see the books as cautionary tales about unhealthy relationships.

Except for Breaking Dawn -- this book just kicks it up a notch and takes the books in a whole other direction which I thoroughly enjoy. It makes it all more fantastical and enjoyable and sexy holy cow. I've got about 100 pages left, wish me luck.

MarySquare said...

And Ali, you do know guys like Edward on this earth, and you'd steer clear of them. They are the smooth talking over possessive psychos that end up beating their wives. Seriously!

C.C. Fisher said...

Mary, really good discussion points. I agree that I too saw the "caretaker" roll in Bella and the "fathering" role in Edward, and that did bother me. I'm not sure I've enjoyed this last book as much as the others. But I will say this: When I was younger (before being married), reading about "marriage experiences" just left me with questions. I didn't necessarily like reading about those parts--just stick with kissing and holding hands--don't cross the line that leads to a trip to the Bishop's office. But now that I'm married, and I read about the marriage parts, I totally love it! And as much as this might gross out everyone, I totally imagine me and Kulani in those roles. Role-play--mee yow! Perhaps this comment should have a warning on it. I know of a few of the young women who read my blog. Sorry for that ladies. When you're older, you'll appreciate it.

Morkthefied said...

Finished reading it. Still disecting it. Not really sure that I loved it as much. Caught one minor mormon-philosophy about "feeling" what the truth is. Anyone else catch that?